Thoughts of a Traveler in a Journey with Jesus.
I was nervous to take this trip for two reason, what would people think and can I really do this on my own? These were the questions I pondered. As many of you might have seen, I am currently in Taiwan traveling around, on Tuesday I will fly to Hong Kong to finish out my time in Asia. As I was preparing for this trip I constantly spoke confidently about going, but inside I struggled with fear. Let me share a little more with you as to why.
My First thing I was nervous about is what people would think. I am a missionary who lives on support, I ask people to partner with me financially and now I am taking a trip to Asia? Does not “look” great huh? I have often seen how easy it is to judge a book by its cover… especially with having social media involved… you don’t always get the whole picture. Most people may never know that I have been saving money each month for the last 7 years to take a trip, others may not know that originally I was going to visit my boyfriend and when we broke up I had to make the choice to continue on with this trip or not. When I prayed about what to do, I felt the Lord say “come away with me, come take a journey with me” and that’s just what this is, a time away with my Daddy. A book can’t always be judged by its cover… things often go much deeper than a cover, I’m super thankful for that. Its a beautiful reminder for me to not be so quick to judge the actions of those around me but to seek the Lords heart in all things.
Secondly I wondered if I could really do this on my own. When people would ask me who I was traveling with, I would inform them I was going by myself and always seemed to get the same response “wow you are brave”. I really thought nothing of it till I was on my 14 hour flight where I had the “oh no, what have I done” moment. Yesterday was my first full day here, it took me a few hours till I was ready to leave the safety of the hotel room. Its not that I felt like I was in danger but I was overwhelmed with the thought of “what if this was a mistake?” But as I ventured around yesterday there was this sense of freedom, that I was exploring a new city with my Daddy and around every corner He would excitedly grab my hand and say “come look over here at this, I created this for you to see”. I got lost many times but there was no fear in it, rather it was an opportunity to see even more. It really reminds me of this past season in my life. I thought I had life figured out, I thought I was leaving Guatemala in September and that a new chapter of life was going to begin, then it all fell apart. For a moment there I felt lost, I thought maybe I had made a terrible mistake in moving forward in where I thought the Lord was taking me, but then He reminded me, its ok to get lost for a little bit, it just leads to new adventures. The best part, is our Father is the best map reader and direction giver, He is like a GPS that never messes up. As I felt lost yesterday all I had to do was stop, pull out my map, and ask for directions. The same thing goes for our journeys with the Lord, when we feel lost, all we have to do is ask Him for direction. He might not always give us the directions we expect Him to or are even hoping for but we get to trust that He knows the best for us and has our best in mind. For me its staying in Guatemala, a place that has become my home, a place that I thought I would be leaving but am overjoyed to by staying.
The journey is not promised to be easy, but He promised to always be with us. Although I am only in my second day here in Asia I feel like the Lord has already spoken some sweet and beautiful things to me. As I shared with people that I would be traveling solo a few people replied back, “but you won’t be solo, Jesus is going with you”. Oh how true that is, such beautiful and wise words. I know in my life’s journey there will be many more ups and downs but one thing that stays the same is the Lord… He is the constant factor. As I continue to travel over the next 11 days I am excited to hear from my Father more and more, I am excited to do this journey with Him, not just in Asia but for the rest of my life. Oh how thankful I am that He has chosen me first, that He reaches out His hand toward me and all I have to do is take it.
